Tuesday, December 16, 2008

(re)Turning Point: More Anger

Well not surprisingly like the achievement whore I am I went back to turning point to scrounge as much as I can (I just hit the 30000 point mark!) So I beat it on Normal then I beat the final mission on insane and hard. Got some more achievements like Swirly, where you stick a guy into a toilet.

That's a good analogy for this game! Like sticking your head in a shitter! I'm going to lay down some fucking rules for developers!

For some stupid ass reasons developers want to make a brand new game (i.e. not a sequel) and throw in a multiplayer system. If you are going to do this DON'T put achievements there! Why? BECAUSE NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT YOUR GAME YET! If your game becomes somewhat popular then you can add achievements to the sequel!

For example Call of Duty 3: Has a fucking 20000 pt achievement which I estimated would take me 3 months of around the clock playing.

Prey: I loved the single player campaign. But where the hell did they get off thinking they could make a multiplayer? Why? It's fucking stupid!

Fuck even Medal of Honour: Airborne made a fucking multiplayer campaign with achievements and no one but three people play it.

THEN THERE'S Turning Point: Fall of Liberty

In my review I slammed it for bugs, lack of weapons, lack of story, etc. and instead of remedying those problems they built a fucking multiplayer system. FUCK ME!

There is NO ONE PLAYING AT ALL! NONE! ZERO! In fact in the Top 10 players list there are only 6 people for this month. 6 people in a fucking 10 person list!

Do you know why I hate multiplayer achievements? THIS! How the fucking am I supposed to get the following achievements from Turning Point: Fall of Liberty? (In order of preposterousness)
  • Maybe I Should Go Outside: Get 2500 ranked match kills in any mode
  • Killer Instinct: Get 500 ranked match kills in any mode
  • Killer: Get 100 ranked match kills in any mode
  • World Tour: Finish a multiplayer game on EVERY MAP in EVERY MODE
  • One in the Chamber: Kill a player in a ranked match with the last bullet in a pistol clip
  • Staying Alive: Finish a ranked match in Deathmatch mode without dying
  • Team Player: Win 20 ranked matches in Team Deathmatch mode
  • MVP: Win an 8 player Team Deathmatch with the highest score
  • pwnt: Finish an 8-player Deathmatch with the most kills
  • Uberdork: Win 5 ranked matches in Deathmatch mode
  • Next Time Take The Stairs: Fall to your death during a multiplayer game
  • First Time for Everything: Finish a multiplayer game
I can't get any of them! BETTER YET 2500 KILLS!

P.S. They also put in a fucking sprint for 30 minutes achievement which is fucking ridiculous since sprint only last 10 seconds or even less!

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