Stinger503's QuickList: Weapons (P1/3)

I'm going to be doing a 3 part series on weapons that are awesome. First is real life weapon categories, 2nd is an individual weapon in those categories and third is most awesome video game guns.

Best Weapons- And none of that Hand to Hand getting #1 bullshit that I've seen on the Military Channel, apparently they haven't seen Indiana Jones or The Last Samurai


10. Light Machine Gun

These mothers are half beast, half machine. Surprisingly the best examples of these are from World War II. Which was likely because you actually could have to shoot 20-30 guys at once while on the move, something you wouldn't need in Bagdad today. So while they do fire alot of bullets, their pretty cumbersome compared to ARs and SMGs, which is why it's tenth.

9. Assualt Rifles

These have been big ever since WWII. Any modern army needs a good assualt rifle. They've taken centerstage in almost all the wars since the 2nd World War including Vietnam, Iraq, Korea and Afghanistan. While they are useful, their track record isn't that good. Aside from a gun I'll mention in pt 2, guns like the M16 is notorious for jamming in combat. I feel bad for putting ARs so high on the list, espicially with modern weapons like the FAMAS, M4 and having fu**ing grenade launchers on them.





8. Pistol

Pistols are the classic weapon. From the 1812 musket balls to the Wild West stand offs, German Lugers, PP7s, Desert Eagles, Police, armies, rebels, criminals. Pistols have been everywhere. That is all.

7. Bolt-Action Rifle

I love WWII rifles. It was a time before ARs had taken over and it didn't matter if your gun was shitty because you were a badass. Just look at this illustrious list of names:

• Springfield


• Mauser


• Lee-Enfield


• Mosin-Nagant


• and a favourite I'm listing in pt 2

6. Sub-Machine Gun

What I love about SMGs I their dependability, compactness, and silence. Used by most special forces, the SMGs is the opposite of AR. Which I love.

5. Mounted Gun/ Heavy Machine Gun

What is better than unleashing a seemingly unending torrent of bullets at a foe? Look below.

4. Flame Thrower




Can also be used for snow on your driveway Seriously

3. Shotgun

Future of Shotguns

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!

2. RPGs

Rocket Launcher, Panzerfaust, Panzershreck, Bazooka, Rocket Propelled Grenade. Take your pick.

1. Sniper Rifles

I love snipers. Think about the legacy of badassedness. Russian Snipers, British, American, Canadian, and German sharpshooters are all badass. Enemy At The Gates is a good example. There's also Sniper Wolf, Saving Private Ryan, etc. I love snipers.

I AM EVIL

One of my favourite things to do in Grand Theft Auto IV multiplayer is to go up to a roof with a sniper rifle and well... snipe. However today was different. I had already gone up once and was restocking ammo and going back up. Well as I was going up I heard "There's an orange guy over here follow me!" I look at my radar and notice that they indeed are coming towards me. A second later..."He's going up! There's got to be a door in there! There it is!"

Now first you have to understand this is a 30 story hospital. It takes almost two minutes to get to the top. It's a huge hassle. So at first I think, "Crap! I'm outnumbered!" and for a second I panic. A second later I realize, "Hey I have a rocket launcher and the element of surprise!" Of course I watch them both begin their scramble to the top. It's quite humourous, much like mice through a maze. On their way up one says "I hope he doesn't have a mic. He'd know we were coming." Oh sweet irony. I get in position at the entrance and prepare, checking periodically to see their progress. The 1st is only a few flights from the top. I get to position and kneel down. He comes up gun drawn but he doesn't stand a chance as I unleash hell. For me it almost felt to risky. "He had a rocket launcher!" he exclaims, well this time I go up against the wall where I can see them coming up and put my RPG of the railing. The second is only about two floors from the top and I fire one straight into his cage like coffin.

At this point they're all pissed off. "Oh my god. I just wanted to see the top!" At this point I also laugh maniacally! The first one respawns and begins to ascend again. The second says "I'm getting a helicopter!" Well the first one met the same fate as the second as only a few floors from the top I fire into the cage containing the stairs. He dies.

I spend the rest of the level trying to shoot people. The second guy goes after a helicopter but goes to the airport which is way to far to get back in time.