Grand Theft Escapdes

I was originally going to post these stories a long time ago. So I'm going to just post them now:

While in a game of cops & robbers I decide to get out of the car and split us up. Of course seconds later I hear the sirens closing in and there isn't a car in sight! I just barely am able to hide behind a guard booth. I luckily run around a bunch of flat beds as the police turn their attention to me. The flat beds serve as a roadblock and I jump over some walls onto a road with... CARS! I jack one and head towards my destination, of course I just passed the road to access it so I turn and work my way to the bridge I'm more familiar with. Uh-oh! My entire team just died.
And now I have two cops cars following me.

I go on the bridge and I have a fair lead on them going the wrong way down the road. And then in some sort of chain collision my car comes to a complete stop! This, you know, sort of, ALLOWS THEM TO BE ON MY ASS! They have Uzis out and my car is taking a beating. I quickly switch to the other lane which only helps momentarily. I speed through the toll booth and it dawns on me, "There is NO WAY IN HELL THIS CAR IS GETTING ME THERE!" My car, still taking Uzi fire, catches fire. No not the engine kind of fire that takes a minute to explode, no this was a gas tank fire and my car was going to explode at any second. I know I only have one hope of surviving. I speed towards a gap in the wall and fly thorough the air and jump out of the car in mid-air. Not only was this the most badass thing I've ever done. I firmly believe that for 5 minutes I had done the most badass thing in the world at that moment.

My car luckily crashed in the water and didn't explode. I landed in the water as well. The police could only watch from the bridge as I swam to another island. This island only has one access and I'd get there first. I quickly jacked a car and made my way around to the boat and left the police in my dust.

Part Deux

I was playing carjack (basically everyone goes for a car and then attempts to take that car to a drop off) and here's what happened.

I start off with another person and we both head to a car while the other two head towards a second car. I get there first and begin to drive off. As a start down a large road, he gets a lucky shot and I die. I respawn and head towards the guy who just killed me. Unfortunately I get there too late and he get the points. Angry, I kill him and jack an SUV and head towards a drop off point.
As I close in I realize the two with the other car are battling and trying to get to the drop off I'm going for. The guy I just killed is coming up behind me now as well. I analyze the situation. To get into the drop off area you need to go through a small gap between a wall and a building The pink guy has nailed the green guy who's in the car to the wall with a bus! As I pull up she unloads a Uzi on the green dude and he's gone. I quickly come up with a plan. I jump over the wall, pull the dead guy out and skank the points for myself! While this was happening the pink guy kills the other guy who was coming. I get out of the car and aim my AK at the wall. Sure enough pink pokes his head over and I pop him.

I then go around the wall and get into my SUV and go towards another dropoff. Unfortunately this one is farther away so I work my way down. I pass green on the way and he pops my left rear tire. Just great. I continue and unfortunately make a wrong turn and and up below the drop point. I look on my radar and see that pink is right above me! With a flat tire, I know there's no getting away now. I get out and pull out my AK and go up to a fence. I see her car fly over the railing and crash to the ground. She continues towards me. I unload into the windshield but don't kill her! She crashes through the fence and I get thrown over the car. She begins to back up over me. Then accelerates to run me over again. All this while shooting a pistol at me. I am at her mercy. In desperation I get up and jump to avoid her car. She nicks me but I don't fall down! I pull out my AK and fill her windshield again and there's no escaping this time. Exasperated I climb back into my SUV and work my way back around and score again. I begin to work my way back to another car but there's only 20 seconds left in the round. I win WOOT!